In the beginning, Part II

Nathan started Kindergarten in the fall of 2013.  I made sure to join the PTA like everyone suggested.  At Meet the Teacher night, I stayed behind and let his teacher know that Nathan was going to be a great kid in her class and that she was going to enjoy having him, but there were some things she needed to know about him.  I told her that he had some struggles with transitions, and tended to get a bit wiggly when he needed to go to the bathroom and she didn't need to ask him if he needed to go, but just tell him to go.  She seemed to accept our advice, and we knew this was going to be a great year!

The first day of school was great!  Nathan was super excited, and he wore his brand new shoes, his brand new shorts, and his brand new back pack and brought his lunch to school.  Nathan is a very picky eater and nothing they served at school for lunch was anything he would enjoy, so I figured it was just easier to pack him something to bring.  I had a job that allowed me to drop him off and pick him up so there was no need for before or after school care.  I had the ability to have a daily conversation with the teacher on how his day was going, so I knew how his behavior was going.  Day one was great.  Day two, not so much.  Day three, I was ready to cry.  The teacher seemed confident that we were just testing boundaries and that we just needed to give it some time.  By the fourth week of school and several bad days, I had all but lost hope in what we were going to do to help our son.  What I didn't understand, is my son obeyed me.  He minded me when I told him what to do.  He minded his babysitter.  He minded his teachers at church.  Why couldn't he mind or obey his teachers in a classroom?

For each complaint that the teacher had, I would have a talk with Nathan and ask him why he did what he did.  First complaint, he wouldn't sit still on the carpet in the classroom during group instruction.  I would ask my son why he couldn't sit still.  He said his underwear was rubbing his bottom cheeks and making him uncomfortable.  I'm a fixer, so I can fix this.  We changed his underwear. My boy is now a proud wearer of boxer briefs.  Problem solved.  Next!  The teacher still complained he couldn't sit still.  I asked my son, why won't you sit still?  He said the buttons on the pockets of his jeans are poking his bottom.  Ok.  I can fix this!  We purchased several pairs of athletic pants and tossed the blue jeans.  Again, problem solved!  Next!  The teacher still complained he wouldn't sit still and kept crawling around on the carpet and would make noises.  What? What is going on with this kid?  I signed up for every parenting class known to man kind and watched every video. I became the EXPERT!  How To Have A New Kid By Friday!  Check!  Done!  We watched that series, took notes, and practiced all the methods.  Monday came and then left, and by Friday, we... had the same kid.  The same kid who was crawling around on the carpet at school and was in obvious discomfort and would not listen to the teacher's instructions and was constantly getting notes sent home.  At this point, I'm starting to blame the teacher.  My kid minds me.  My kid listens to me.  It's her problem now.  She needs to figure it out.  There's nothing wrong with my kid.

About this time, Nathan celebrates his 6th birthday and it's time for his annual check up with his doctor.  Every year they ask if there's anything you want to discuss, so I brought up the fact that we're having issues at school.  I told her how we've changed his wardrobe, and that my son just can't seem to sit still, and is having trouble listening to instructions.  She asked some odd questions, about his coordination, and other things, and then suggests to me this thing called Sensory Processing Disorder.  What the what?

We did as she suggested, and made an appointment with an occupational therapist for an evaluation, and figured we check this thing out.  I'm a google-er.  I googled this thing and it blew my mind.  This is my kid.  To a T.  And this describes everything about my kid from birth.  From BIRTH!

When we brought my son home from the hospital, we used to think it was cute that he needed to be swaddled as tightly as possible otherwise he wouldn't sleep.  Little did we know...

My son was born sucking his thumb.  And he still sucks it to this day.  Little did we know...

My son never really grasped the concept of kicking his legs forward then pulling them back to give himself momentum to get himself to swing.  Little did we know...

My son can't dribble a ball.  Little did we know...

My son can't peddle a tricycle to get it to go forward, instead just waddles with it and still has fun.  Little did we know.

My son "W" sits because his trunk strength is too weak.  (I didn't even know there was a such thing).

It is all making sense to us now.  Our son, who we just thought was a bit quirpy, has a real need.

After our evaluation with the Occupational Therapist, it was determined he has Sensory Processing Disorder along with possible dyspraxia.  Of course I googled what that all meant too.  They suggested weekly OT visits and offered several suggestions on how we can make his life easier in the classroom. They also helped us define where his sensory issues were a problem, and now we could finally get help!  WOW!  Hope!  My kid isn't a "bad" kid, he can't help it, and now the teacher is going to understand, and life is going to be better, right???

WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

In the beginning, Part I

Where to begin? I think the best place to start is when we first discovered our perfect little world was no longer what we knew to be perfect anymore.

After my son was born in 2007, we made the decision that I would continue to work full time, and so we found the perfect place for him to have full time care during the day while I worked.  He stayed in the home of a wonderful woman, we call Wils, and she loved on him and took care of him the best way I could ever ask anyone to do so when it wasn't myself giving the care.  She took the kids to the library every week and rocked them to sleep for naps every day.  She kissed their boo boos and she celebrated their birthdays.  She loved these children more than I could ever ask anyone to love my child.

Nathan was about to turn 5 years old and we knew the next fall he would be starting Kindergarten.  We made the decision that it was probably time that he attended preschool.  Although, he knew all his ABCs and 123s and was already starting to read a little, we figured getting used to a classroom environment would benefit him before starting the real deal.  He would go two days a week at the local preschool and get used to the classroom environment and then when Kindergarten started, we would be ready, or so I thought.

On September 4, 2012, Nathan started preschool.  He was probably the tallest in his class, maybe the oldest, but this is when we started learning there was more to Nathan than we ever even dreamed possible.

After a few weeks of preschool, we started getting calls from the director letting us know that they were having problems with Nathan and his behavior.  My first thoughts were, "Not MY Nathan!".  I had many conversations with his babysitter Wils about the complaints that the preschool was having on whether or not she had the same issues and just never told me.  The preschool kept saying that maybe it's because he never had so much structure before.  This of course insulted me because even though he was in a home environment, they had structure!  Why wouldn't my son behave for these new teachers?  What was going on with him?  Who was this child?  And what were we going to do about it?

Some of the complaints that they were giving just floored me.  I was told my son was pinching others, that he was being very defiant with the teachers.  He was testing his boundaries and there was a point that I honestly believed my child was going to be the first ever kid expelled from preschool.  I was mortified.

After careful evaluation, we decided, maybe it was because he wasn't used to the structure of a classroom environment, and if we had any hope of him being successful in Kindergarten, we should probably increase the amount of days he was attending preschool.  So we changed him from 2 days to 3 days a week.  During this time, he also got a new teacher.  This new teacher is one that I later learned, had a lot of experience with children with special needs, and she seemed to be able to reign my son in and help him gain more control.  Finally, we had success.  We decided that he had issues with transitions, and that we just need to prepare him more about any upcoming changes, and avoid anything that may be super stimulating.  They told me that when he had the opportunity for water or sand play, that he tended to get a bit out of control, so they would limit his exposure to those stations.

I didn't think that meant much, but took note and made sure I would let his Kindergarten teacher be aware when we met her in the fall.  I felt prepared, and ready.  We were going to have a successful Kindergarten year.  Or so I thought...